Sweet First Aid Mints – Allergy to People
Ever wake up and immediately regret the existence of... literally everyone? Same. These are the mints for those days when humanity feels like a full-time job you never applied for. Crisp, cool, and deliciously dismissive, these bad boys are here to soothe your social fatigue and freshen your breath — even if your patience is running on fumes.
They're like a breath of fresh air in a world full of loud chewers, close talkers, unsolicited texters, and people who say “Let’s circle back.”
Pop one. Pretend you’re nice. Walk away.
âœ”ï¸ Social distancing in mint form
âœ”ï¸ Fresh breath, zero emotional availability
âœ”ï¸ Fits perfectly in your pocket, purse, or emotional support bubble
âœ”ï¸ May cause side effects like eye rolls, inner peace, and fewer texts back
For introverts, burnt-out extroverts, and anyone silently screaming on the inside — this one’s for you.